I still haven't gotten a photo of the play house that I'm satisfied with, but this one will do for now. As you can tell by the vacuums and mop buckets on the porch, it needed/still needs a bit of cleaning up. We had a rug in our garage (from the old house) that was just about the right size, so Doug trimmed it and laid it in the play house as a carpet. Much better than the 25-year-old floor underneath!

Did you ever have one of those Barbies that could be pregnant? She had a plastic belly that snapped onto her body (with a little plastic baby inside) and when you were done with that, you just snapped it off and her perfect flat belly was underneath. Aside from the obvious lure of the instantly flat stomach, I so wish that I could just pop this belly off sometimes and give my back a rest!

To brag a little, Lila did a spectacular job at swim class this morning! She can swim all the way across the pool (width, not length) without any help. That's 12 seconds of holding her breath and swimming with her face in the water! I don't even like to get my face wet. This kid is amazing!


voices in my head

*Note: In looking back at old blog posts, from the first few months of Lila's life, I've noticed that I mentioned almost nothing about what I was going through emotionally. I don't like that, partly because it seems dishonest and partly because I wish I had a better record for my own benefit. So I'm determined to be more forthright this time around.

I'm having a pretty rough day. Actually, I've been having a rough few days. Depression is rearing its ugly head again, possibly due to a surge in hormones as my delivery draws near. I'm already having thoughts and feelings that are remarkably similar to what I experienced after Lila was born. Thoughts of how I'm a terrible mother and I don't deserve my children, blah blah blah. I'm really not a fan of hormones. Or Satan. Two things which are pretty close to the same in my opinion. :o)~

On a related note, I finally got an appointment with a new psychiatrist (had to get away from the old one because i found her, and many of her policies, to be more frustrating than helpful)! I started with a list of 12 who were on my insurance and relatively nearby and before I was done, I thought I was going to run out of names. Most of them were either not accepting new patients or not accepting my insurance anymore or wanted me to switch counselors, etc. Good grief!

[For a bit of background on this photo, I made a shrimp salad for dinner on Saturday evening and there was quite a bit of it left over. For a before-bed snack, Doug decided to eat the remaining shrimp and toss the rest (because leftover salad is limp and icky). I walked into the living room and found him doing this. He explained that he just didn't want to dirty another dish, but it still cracked me up.]


Our Last Week

Finally, some new photos of Lila to post! I go through phases where I take pictures like crazy and other times where it barely crosses my mind. When I finally ran out of recent photos and had to go back to Easter, I decided it was time to be intentional about getting some new ones. Anyway, here is a picture of my cutie in her new (to us) car! Thank you, Grandaddy!

I'm 38 weeks pregnant now and I had my last appointment with the doctor today! The next time I see her it will be for my c-section - woah! Eli should be really plumped up and weigh about 6.8 lbs. I've had a couple of very brief ultrasounds lately to check his position and you can tell that he's much fatter and crowded looking in there. He's over 19.5 inches long (like a leek). Soon, we'll know his exact size!

I'm so excited to hold Eli and actually see him and watch him move instead of just feeling him move and speculating about what he looks like. I can't wait to touch those little hands and feet! Ack! His organs are all mature and he's ready for life outside the womb. I would love to know what (besides God) tells your body when it's finally time for labor to start... :)


This Old House

We've already had an exciting day around here. For those who don't know, my mother's father, Dorsey Elmer Jordan, Jr., died a few weeks ago. He was always wonderful at building things, and when I was a little girl he built a play house for me. It's a fantastic little house - doors and windows that open and close, shingled roof, paneled walls, and it's even wired to have electricity run to it!

After Grandad died, I asked to have the play house moved from his backyard (in the dallas area) to mine. Besides the fact that it's very special to me, I now have my own little girl who will love playing in there as much as I did. My step-father, Frank, graciously offered to round up a few friends, load the house, drive it to Austin, and move it into our backyard.

Well, today was the day! After lots of pre-work by Doug (to prepare the area where it would be sitting), and lots of moving and grunting and making the women-folk nervous by Frank, Doug, and three other men, the play house is in our backyard! As soon as Lila wakes up from her nap, we will be out there, giving it a good cleaning and moving some of her little furniture into it. I'm so excited (for both of us)!